In her book, Friendship for Grownups, author Lisa Whelchel honestly shares about the facade she wore for decades in her girlfriend relationships. Oh, she had lots of ‘friends’ but no deep friendships she truly trusted. Ironically she starred in a hit sitcom about friendships when she was merely a teenager (The Facts of Life). Adapting herself to an independent life while juggling the busyness of motherhood and a writing career allowed her to become somewhat transparent with others but never vulnerable or willing to develop intimate relationships.
She unfolds her journey to deeper adult friendships as well as lessons she learned along the way through personal experiences illustrated in her writing and the book:
- Addresses handling conflict and finding ‘safe’ friends
- Includes great tips for developing safe friendships.
- Provides insightful discussion questions for groups
- Provides exercises to personally apply lessons and develop closer friendships
- Is appropriate for individuals, group studies or one-on-one studies
Lisa also gives pages of insightful conversation prompts that can be used to cultivate closer friendships.
I’ve gone through this book with a group of women and am currently discussing it with a longtime acquaintance who has now become a trustworthy close friend due in part to this book. It is an easy read and it could be on your list for a light-hearted, yet risk-taking, approach to growing greater depth in your friendships. I’m glad to be on a new journey in friendships even though it takes more courage than I’d imagined.
“Friendship is about risk. Love is about risk. If we can control it and manage it and manufacture it, then it’s something else. But if it’s really love, really friendship, it is a little scary around the edges”. – Lisa Whelchel, Friendship for Grown-Ups (p. 142)