Category Archives: Devotion & Inspiration

The Christmas Gift

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A wonderful vignette written by my cousin Stewart, aka ‘Buddy’, McElhannon a couple years ago.  I hope you find a ‘Katherine’ or ‘some Katherines’ to help this season if you are able.

Her name was Katherine.

She worked at the Chick-fil-A Restaurant in the Food Court next to my office building. Each morning, as was my custom, I would drop into the Chick-fil-A and order a medium iced tea – half sweet, half unsweet. Katherine usually took my order. In her 50’s, short and sweet, she reminded me of a doting grandmother.

“Half sweet, half unsweet, half sweet, half unsweet…” When I first met her, I was struck by how she would mutter to herself as she walked from the counter to the tea dispenser, making sure she didn’t forget my order. It didn’t take her long to remember me, though, and soon she anticipated my order even before I said anything. “Half sweet, half unsweet?”

During Christmas, 2008, I had started a personal tradition of wrapping small gifts, like Hershey candy bars, and handing them out to people I encountered each day as a simple way of saying “Merry Christmas!” The usual targets of this Santa’s giveaway included the security guards, the secretaries, the various receptionists, and, of course, my friendly workers at Chick-fil-A. But as Christmas approached in 2009, I wanted to give something other than a chocolate bar. To my most pleasant surprise, the local Lifeway Bookstore had a special Christmas offer: they were selling Casting Crown’s latest Christmas CD for $5. It was already my personal favorite Christmas CD. I grabbed 20 CD’s and went home to wrap them.

The next day, with my CD’s all wrapped and in my bag, I went to work with my best Santa Clause grin and proceeded to hand out these token Christmas gifts, wishing all of the familiar faces a hearty Merry Christmas! When I dropped by Chick-fil-A that morning, I picked up my tea and handed a rather shocked Katherine the wrapped gift. A big smile immediately exploded across her face. “Oh thank you” was all she could say.

Now I must confess that after spending part of my day giving out these gifts, I felt pretty good. It was fun to see people’s reactions and quite heartwarming to surprise someone with an unexpected gift. But I was not prepared for what happened a couple weeks later.

It was Monday, January 4th, and I was back at work. Stopping by ChicK-fil-A, I was greeted by Katherine with that smile on her face, already muttering, “Half sweet, half unsweet?” After filling my order, Katherine looked at me and shared how much she appreciated the gift of the CD. She went on to explain that her husband had recently lost his job and money was so tight they decided not to give any gifts at Christmas. So she had taken my gift home and placed it under the tree. And with a cheerful, almost beaming countenance, she exclaimed “It was the ONLY gift I opened on Christmas morning. My husband and I loved the music and I just wanted to tell you thank you so very much.”

What could I say? I really don’t remember what I did say other than smile and offer a lame “you’re welcome.” With my head spinning and my knees shaking, I somehow walked outside only to stop and wipe the tears from my eyes. Could it possibly be that the only gift Katherine had at Christmas was the $5 CD I had given her? Humbled, I somehow made it to my desk. The day was a blur as my mind seldom strayed far from that morning’s encounter.

Frankly, at this point I remain at a loss for words. I am a blessed man. With the love of my wife and children, countless gifts at Christmas and a home filled with joy and scents of a Christmas season, I am not sure I can even fathom a Christmas morning like Katherine had. Grateful but humbled with all that I have been blessed, I am once again reminded that the true gift of Christmas is not what is wrapped under the tree but what was wrapped in a manger in Bethlehem some 2000+ years ago. “Oh Lord, help me to be a generous man, a channel of your blessings to those around me, not only at Christmas but every day of the year. Thank you that a single gift under Katherine’s tree was a reminder of THE single Gift You gave to all of us.”

First Week of Advent – Hope

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I hope your Thanksgiving holidays were full of memory making!  Because two of  my teenage nieces were visiting, I had my first experience with black Friday shopping!  Wow!  I never knew one could wait in a check out line for over an hour in the middle of the night.  I’m promoting cyber shopping for future Thanksgiving visits.

Now it’s time to continue giving thanks as we enter the Advent season.  Yesterday was the first Sunday of advent.

On the first Sunday a purple candle is lit. This candle is typically called the “Prophecy Candle” in remembrance of the prophets, primarily Isaiah, who foretold the birth of Christ. This candle represents hope or expectation in anticipation of the coming Messiah.

Each week on Sunday, an additional candle is lit. On the second Sunday of Advent, the second purple candle is lit. This candle represents love.

On the third Sunday of Advent the pink, or rose-colored candle is lit. This pink candle is called the “Shepherds Candle” and it represents joy.

The fourth and last purple candle, oftentimes called the “Angels Candle,” represents peace and is lit on the fourth Sunday of Advent.

On Christmas Eve, the white center candle is lit. This candle is called the “Christ Candle” and represents the life of Christ that has come into the world. The color white represents purity. Christ is the sinless, spotless, pure Savior.

May your week be filled with hope.

Lord, we sense your power and your might
and we stand in awe of the hope you give.
As we  begin this Advent journey,
teach us to turn to you as our hope.

O come, O come, Emmanuel,
And ransom captive Israel,
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear.

Rejoice! Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, O Israel.

Thanksgiving: It’s a Matter of Intention

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During a personnel performance review cycle years ago, we had peer-to-peer and employee to manager reviews as well as manager to employee reviews. One of my many reviewers constructively critiqued me by suggesting I not see everything as ‘utopia’ and focus more on problems.

I took the criticism seriously, but admittedly it is a natural bent for me to look at the bright side of things, and at times my rose-colored glasses need removal. It may be annoying to some people, but optimism is a way that I cope with certain difficult situations. This is not to say I don’t struggle with grumbling and complaining, but gratitude is usually not the most challenging exercise for me. Interestingly, the gratitude lab found that ‘the disposition toward gratitude appears to enhance pleasant feeling states more than it diminishes unpleasant emotions. Grateful people do not deny or ignore the negative aspects of life….’

Recently, my lack of gratitude took me by surprise. My husband found the solution to a chronic nagging problem I had faced for several years, and I was incredibly grateful every day that the problem was resolved! Yet after several weeks, I noticed less acknowledgement of gratitude. A new normal made it easy to take this treasured relief for granted.

It takes intention to increase and maintain our gratitude level and reap the many benefits we discussed yesterday. Here are some proven steps we can take toward this end:

1. Keep a ‘daily list’ or ‘gratitude journal’. List 7–10 things that you are grateful for each day. Use a journal or notebook. There are even gratitude apps for mobile devices.
2. Write gratitude notes. Maximize the value of your gratitude by writing a letter to someone you appreciate. Start with one person a week.
3. Each time you pick up the phone, send a text, or email someone, give thanks for that person. Take time to remember how grateful you are for the people and provisions in your life.
4. If you are struggling with sadness or are in a bad mood, quickly jot down or mentally note five things for which you are thankful.
5. Seek out grateful people and avoid those who gossip and complain. (That means don’t gossip or complain!)
6. Publicly acknowledge others with gratitude.

Gratitude is contagious. By increasing your gratitude, others will benefit. Emmons’ studies show that ‘expressions of gratitude by one person tend to motivate others to express gratitude thus having a virtuous cycle started, as well as reciprocal behavior.’

Gratitude affirms. We will still have areas that we wish were different, no one implies that we ought to put on rose-colored glasses to obscure shortcomings. ‘But most of us tend to focus so heavily on the deficiencies in our lives that we barely perceive the good that counterbalances them.’ (Dr. Alan Morinis)  We need to shift our focus.

Gratitude is a choice.  It’s not circumstances or genetic wiring or something that we don’t have control over. Gratitude is an attitude we can choose that makes life better for ourselves and for other people. I think about it as a best-practice approach to life…Emmons says, ‘When things go well gratitude enables us to savor things going well. When things go poorly gratitude enables us to get over those situations and to realize they are temporary.’

Be joyful always; pray continually;  give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.  1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Give thanks to the LORD Almighty, for the LORD is good; his love endures forever. Jeremiah 33.11

Let’s take a gratitude challenge and be intentional this season as well as in the year to come.  Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Thanksgiving: It’s a Matter of Perspective

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A past family thanksgiving photo reveals a giant turkey with Brent’s mom and brother (we sure miss you, Jess). The bird was a only a 13 pounder,  yet it looks like it weighed 25 pounds!  Perspective can be deceptive!

This turkey confusion is not unlike our human ability to make a mountain out of a molehill and see our life issues from a negative perspective. There’s nothing like a paradigm shift toward gratitude to help our health and well-being. Studies show that the practice of gratitude has a variety of benefits.  Dr. Robert Emmons of University of California, Davis, runs a research lab dedicated to the study of gratitude and thanksgiving.

“Gratitude research is beginning to suggest that feelings of thankfulness have tremendous positive value in helping people cope with daily problems, especially stress,” Emmons says.  “So much of gratitude is about one’s perspective and framework for looking at the world and at self. People who tend to be more mindful of the benefits they’ve received tend to focus their attention outward,” Emmons explains.

Some specific areas affected by gratitude are:

  • lower stress levels
  • higher energy and alertness
  • measureable improvements in mood – more positive emotions and optimism
  • lower levels of depression
  • fewer headaches and colds
  • better physiological health (heart rhythms and sleep patterns)
  • greater sense of being connected to others

People with a strong disposition toward gratitude have the capacity to be empathic and to take the perspective of others. They are rated as more generous and more helpful by people in their social networks (McCullough, Emmons, & Tsang, 2002).

Emmons has found that grateful individuals place less importance on material goods and are less likely to judge their own and others success in terms of possessions accumulated.  They are less envious of others and are more likely to share their possessions with others relative to less grateful persons.

The bible heartily promotes gratitude and thanksgiving and mentions the word ‘thanks’ in our English translations over 100 times.  My quick research of the Hebrew and Greek words reveals that ‘thanks’ is actually much more pervasive than the surface reveals.  ‘Praise’ in many instances in the Old Testament and ‘grace’ in the New Testament find their roots in the same words otherwise translated as ‘thanks’, ‘thanksgiving’, ‘grateful’, or ‘gratitude’.

Be joyful always; pray continually;  give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.  1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Give thanks to the LORD Almighty, for the LORD is good; his love endures forever.  Jeremiah 33.11

Need practical ways to increase your ‘gratitude’ factor and potentially integrate gratitude as your everyday attitude?  Stayed tuned for tomorrow when I’ll share some effective tips.